A Small Point Perhaps

Maybe because I've got a radical streak runnin' straight up my spine (or maybe because I've spent much of my life working on the decks of ships, tugs, and oilfield vessels), I can't stand so-called froo-froo flemish coils laying around on deck.

You know what a flemish coil is, right? Some poor benighted soul takes the free end of a line and spins it outwards on deck until he has a nice tight spiral laying there for all the world to notice. Looks yachty and knowledgeable. Hooooop-teeeeee-dooooooo!

But have I ever seen such a travesty on a commercial ship? Nope! On a tug? Nope! On an oil-field boat? Well, maybe just once...in the wake of a deckhand I worked with years ago. His name was Scooter and he lived for entire two-week hitches on a refrigerated mixture of peanut butter and mayo, but that's another story.

Anyway, I prefer something a little more practical than flemish coils onboard the Betty Jane. My deal's not as yachty (which is fine with me) and lets me dispense with the bitter ends of mooring lines on deck in a much more expeditious fashion. Here's the low-down on it:

Simply coil the line into three or four bights in-hand in the usual fashion, bearing in mind that all line has a natural twist to it that dictates a clockwise coiling motion. While creating the coil in-hand, remember to also roll your right hand outboard (if you're right-handed) as you lay the bights in your left hand. This also helps accommodate twist and nixes chances of kinks.

The next step is to simply drop the coil unceremoniously on the deck near where you want to stow it. While you are doing this, I'd suggest pleasurably imagining some poor bugger stooping to spin lines on deck or, worse yet, getting down on his tired old knees to do it.

And the final step? Toe-kick the coil flat against an adjoining vertical surface like a bulwark or bulkhead. Done!

By the way, if your own boat doesn't have a vertical surface (like Betty's bulwarks, for example) to keep the free end of the line from falling or getting kicked into the drink, more's the pity. You'll have to flemish-coil the dang thing I suppose, a tactic that traps dirt underneath if used in a long-term way.